"I'm excited, but not baked-beans-hat excited."
Wait a second, I want to write that down...
Saturday, August 30, 2025
"Ladies night" isn't what you think it is.
"I didn't know it was a meat raffle. I was just there for the beer."
Tuesday, August 19, 2025
A wide-ranging family, for certain
[At a major corporate store opening]
"Did you know <high-level head-office employee>'s brother is here?"
"Do you mean the pilot?"
"No, the pastor."
Sunday, August 10, 2025
Friday, August 8, 2025
Sometimes family relations require such interventions.
"I need to go check on my mother-in-law. I left her all Benadryl-ed up."
Saturday, August 2, 2025
Just before their first opportunity to judge at a county fair -
"I'm always judging. It just doesn't always involve ribbons."
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